Monday, March 19, 2018

35 Times Women's Clothing Was Beyond Infuriating

Whether you're a girl who prizes practicality over style or one who has made many personal sacrifices to the fashion gods, you have to admit it: women's clothing can be annoying AF. 

From weird tan lines to a total lack of working pockets, here are just a few times we wished women's fashion would burn in hell!

1. When it insisted cringeworthy slogans were the hottest accessory 

I know millennials don't always have the greatest taste in stuff, but since when did anyone want "touch my butt and buy me pizza" splashed across their chest?

2. When women's fashion ruined a perfectly good basic wardrobe staple with something like this

I just want a pair of jeans that doesn't fall down my butt or give me a muffin top! Is that so much to ask?!

3. When it refused to provide you with working pockets 

Why is this only a thing for women's clothing? Do we not deserve the right to carry our belongings in small pouches stitched into our garments? We want #PocketEquality now!

4. When it tried to convince us that one size actually fits all

Not a great purchase for your 16-year-old teenage daughter or for your cat. For different reasons, of course...

5. When it was impossible to escape the cutout trend...

Since when did having strategically placed holes in your clothing become a fashionable thing? Personally, I blame the Sex Pistols...

6. When it made us pay out the nose for garments that looked like leftover moth food

This literally looks like the shirt my dad wears to clean the garage every spring...

7. When it was like, "Nah, why would you need consistent sizing?"

What happened to good old fashioned waist and leg measurements? Damn you, vanity sizing! At this point, why even have sizes?!

8. When the unrealistic body standards applied to literally every body part

No matter how much you diet or work out, no girl will ever have a head small enough to fit through that thing!

9. When it gave us some ridonkulous tan lines

We don't just have to deal with farmer's tans and sunglasses tans. There are crop-top tans, there are strappy sandal tans, and there are weird crochet cut-out tans!

10. Like, seriously ridiculous 

Sure, cutout swimwear looks great on Instagram, but not so much in real life. Just one more reason to slather that SPF 50 on, ladies!

11. When our bras refused to offer us the support we needed

Sure, straps are annoying enough, and underwire will undoubtedly stab you in the back, but don't even get me started on strapless bras!

12. Okay, I guess I'm going to have to address the strapless issue

Basically, anything strapless is the perfect summer apparel if you want to be endlessly infuriated and constantly running the risk of a nip slip!

13. When it made the busty-girl life particularly difficult

Is it impossible to get a formfitting Oxford that doesn't look like it's going to bust open at any moment?

14. When less substance didn't mean we got a break on the price tag markup 

I'm sorry, but did you just charge me 15 extra dollars to cut the bottom off a regular shirt? Fashion is a heartless industry, ladies! 

15. When they told us that wedges would be more comfortable than heels, but it was a damn lie!

If you're a girl who's used to wearing flip-flops around, nothing about having your feet strapped into three-inch wood blocks is comfortable. 

16. When you put on the dress thinking it was mid-thigh, but it all changed when you started walking

No one enjoys having to pull the hem of their dress down all night. Alas, it's a burden the curvy have to bear.

17. When it seduced us with this alluring backless shirt... then crushed our dreams when we discovered we had to wear a stick-on bra 

If it's backless shirt weather, chances are you're going to be sweating, and that bra is not going to be so sticky...

18. When bra shopping for special occasions was the ultimate struggle 

I like to think of myself as an independent woman, but sometimes, I need a hand. What are all these clasps and crisscrossing straps for?! Does this go around my neck or my stomach?!

19. When it gave us the romper and our bathroom trips were never the same again

Don't tell me a garment is "easy" and "low maintenance" if I have to get completely naked in order to pee! 

20. When it was just straight-up confusing AF

Chances are, if you have to ask whether it's a shirt or dress, it's probably a shirt. But, then again, your guess is as good as mine!

21. When our jeans never fail to wear out in the most unfortunate spot possible

You finally get your jeans perfectly soft and worn in and of course, they have to rip right in that one spot!

22. When the back gap was a constant source of jean shopping frustration

You finally find a pair that you can get past your thighs and you have enough room to carry a small burrito around in the back!

23. But seriously...

There are only two types of jeans: the ones that give you a muffin top and the ones with a waistband gap big enough to carry a small animal around in

24. When the pros of your high-waisted pants were outweighed by one single con 

Ahh yes, the dreaded front wedgie. It can creep up without your noticing and catch you off guard!

25. When you kept picking your wedgie all day until you remembered you were wearing a thong 

26. When our bras committed the ultimate betrayal:

Ahh yes, the devastating stab in the back (or ribs) by your most intimate friend who's always been there to support you.

27. When you had to squeeze yourself into the most uncomfortable undergarments in existence because of totally unfair societal expectations!

But also because you paid a lot of money for that bodycon dress and you WILL fit into it at least once in your life.

28. The "Wow, it didn't look this see-through in the store" moment

Courtesy of the deceptive changing room lights that make you look thinner and the clothes look thicker.

29. When all the classic wardrobe staples got snapped up in a day and the rest of us were left with garbage

I just want to find a shirt that doesn't say anything about pizza, tacos, or mermaids on it.

30. No matter how unflattering it was!

This is probably the worst piece of denim ever designed. Alright, the mom jeans were a pretty horrific invention, but at least they didn't expose your muffin top.

31. When our bikini padding did us no favors

You're supposed to keep us perky and shapely, but all you do is get twisted in the washing machine and move around while we wear them!

32. When it was impossible find a pair of jean cut-off shorts that didn't leave your cheeks hanging out

Raising the waistline, doesn't mean we have to raise the hemline too!

33. When it required us to pay atrocious amounts of money for a decent pair of jeans

Sure, they're a nice wash and perfectly cropped, but that's half the price of my first car!

34. When the only one left in your size had someone's makeup smeared all over it

We're all guilty of this crime, but we've all been victims of it as well! When will the vicious cycle end?!

35. When lingerie was so confusing that our trip to the Victoria's Secret changing room had us seriously sympathizing with this kid

Trust me, we're just as embarrassed and horrified as this kid when the fitting room lady finds us.


Author: verified_user