Wednesday, May 23, 2018

17 Things People In Constant Beast Mode Will Understand

When a guy asks me out on a date and it happens to be on a Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, or Saturday during the day, I cringe because I have no idea how to nicely decline his offer by saying, "Sorry, I have a date with the gym that night," and have him not end up hating me for choosing to spend a night burning calories and building muscle without any of his help.

Fellow gym rats, you'd understand, right? You know that you've daydreamed at your desk about that beautiful weight waiting for you, and that swole feel you get after walking out of the gym, or that pleasantly sore feeling you get the next day, and nothing can ever get in the way of you and your swolemate. 

Here are 17 things and problems people in constant beast mode will understand:

1. Whey is rarely ever on sale, and if it is, it's the crappy kind. So when your favorite whey comes on sale, you buy it and you buy it good. 

Toddler for scale.

2. You need to remind yourself not to take too much pre-workout...

3. Your significant other, or your cat, knows the deadly smell of protein farts.

4. Finding a significant other is on the lower end of your list of priorities.

5. You compare calluses with pride and think that callus-free hands are for pussies, but people are always skeptical that it's actually from "weightlifting."

6. You can spot a resolutioner from a mile away.

7. The meatheads give you a bad rep.

8. You can't help but check out the hotties... but only in between sets.

9. You lose your scooper at least three times a week, somewhere in your mountain of whey.

10. The only coco you're in love with is this one:

11. Your phone is full of gym selfies, hopefully to track your progress, and not to spam your Facebook friends.

12. Your alarm looks like this and you usually get up on time because your inner beast is always awake.

13. Your days of rest aren't even enjoyable because you feel guilty. It's like cheating on your significant other.

14. You wake up with sore muscles that you didn't even know you had.

15. You go to the bar every single weekend and you're not really lying.

16. You have your bulking season and your cutting season and whoever you're with has to accept that. As Marilyn Monbroe once said:

17. And I leave you with some inspirational words from Masquatma Gandhi:


Author: verified_user